Goodbye

Dear self,

Saying goodbye is not literally on occasion that you simply wave your hand to bid farewell to each other but it can also symbolise your enthusiasm in leaving alone your past.Cause every time the clock strikes twelve on the day of your first acknowledgement to the world, it'll somehow bring you to enter a new phase of life let alone give you a different meaning and interpretation of your very own story line. So batrisyia,lets grow and discover new things in life. Stop bringing up your past and start to kick off your brand new start,brand new life. Despite all those silly thoughts that ppl have been spitting over you, try to build your own walls and prove them wrong. Make it stiff, make it indestructible! Draw your dreamed future by patiently sketching it in your very own style. Stay rooted my dear. Keep in mind, what's prior should be lined in the first row without ditching the little things. Purify your intention and may He bless you with steadfastness upon seeking for the light in everything that you do. Remind yourself to obey God first, then you'll be free to seek anything in this dunya. Bring your deen along and you may not astray from the right path. Piety is something that you must put all your effort and be devoted to everything that have been restricted by Him. There's no shortcut to pursue victory. Tell yourself, it's okay to fall sometimes, cause you'll be more realistic in planning your long-term strategy. Be rational no matter how hard the barriers keep dragging you down, cause if you let your emotion rule over you, it might render you to switch on your self-destructive mode. If you are at the verge of giving up, remember all the hard works that you've been putting throughout the journey. Remember how tiring it was for your parents to work days and nights to make sure you dont starve and keep your nessicity at all ease. And, remember that God will test you only  for things that you could barely overcome and handle with your own hand.Be strong and live life to the fullest! May force be with you, dear batrisyia afni! 

Cherish your life, make your loved ones happy, spread the good vibes to enlighten ppl's heart and captivate their mind in awe with your charm!

Hello degree, lets embrace each other and enlivened the language!

xoxo,

btrsyafni 

Retrouvailles

Cause I'm alone

Wondering in the woods

As the morning drizzle come

Shower the earth with its charm

How I wish that I tremble in your arm.

Truly

I want to let go of this pain

I want to carve our names

Beautifully without any vein.

Shall my heart speaks louder than me

For you to believe my sincerity?

12.06 p.m

Random

Assalamualaikum

First and foremost, Ramadhan Kareem to all my mosleem brothers and sisters out there. May this month bring us barakah and provide us with steadfastness till the end.

I dont know what came into me tonight, that urge me to blog this instant. Sadly, I dont have any interesting stories or thoughts to share with you guys. Oh gosh, this is so awkward I can tell.

Up to this moment, this girl still, has not being hired by any employers as luck doesnt hit her well. But it's okay, I'm enjoying my freedom, feeling so leisure most of the time and what's more important now, I've become a part-time chaffeur. Well, it has been almost 5 months since I waited for this moment to come. To be proudly replaced my grandpa to fetch my boys at school. Though everyday I need to encounter the same routine, nevertheless, it tested my patience, it taught me to become more punctual (actually it is to free myself and my ears to hear them blabber all the way home if I'm late). To be honest, now I've learnt how my grandpa or even my dad felt when they're waiting for me to finish my school, and how annoyed were they when I'm a bit late from the actual time that we'd dealt in the first place. 15 minutes passed, okay I consider it as acceptable. But what if, half an hour of waiting, is it worth? Goshhhhh it really tests my patience, like seriously.So boys, you better brace yourself from not giving me any trouble, okay? It's better to be 3 hours early than a minute too late. 

That's about me being a chaffeur, so now I would like to do some throwbacks bout my foundation days in UiTM Kuantan, Pahang. As now we're in this holy month of Ramadhan, needless to say, last year, it was my first time fasting away from my family. Ahaa, y'know there're so many major differences when you're fasting away from home. First, there's no one will take the responsibility to wake you up for sahur. Hence, I'm so fortunate to be surrounded with my housemates who are good enough to wake me up for sahur. We take turns to delegate this job to make it fair and square for everybody. And the most essential part is, people told me that my alarm was deadly annoyed to the extent that they cant even continue their sleep upon hearing my alarm. Even those who slept on the upper deck will surely go down to find and make my alarm stop. Hahaha. Oh god, they're probably pissed off with my alarm, I guess. Sorry girls:P. Okay, move on to the second issue, which is, finance. For god's sake, money flow like water, and you dont even have the chance to glare a little longer to the initial amount of money that you draw from the atm, cause the moment you put your glance away and turn back to where it was, your money had already gone. *swish swish*. It is not a metaphore that I'm trying to make, but, it's the cold truth that lies upon every students' life. We need to struggle between spending our money on books and foods. That's why, taking up courses such as money management is very crucial to guide teens to be very good and efficient in spending their pocket money. ( which sometimes (okay no, most of the time) , I,myself failed to properly spend my money on things that are far away more important compared to clothes and shoes) This is why we really need to look up into this matter very carefully in order to survive. 

*Batrisyia, you really need to learn on how to spend your allowance, do not waste!*

Eheh, such a troublesome through and through.

The last issue that I can share is, perhaps the culture and food. In the first place, as a Kelantanese, I really look forward towards their cooking, as I might assume it totally differ from my hometown's delicacies. So, tbh, it was really different. Even the murtabaks are not as good compared to what I'd been eating all this long. Well, not to say that I loathe the foods in Kuantan, but I can proudly say that Kelantan has the best taste ever. #GomoKelateGomo , hohoho. I dont usually go to the bazaars, but when I go there, it does give me an excited feeling to walk pass by all the food stalls that promote various type of foods, that are unlikely to get it in Kelantan or other places. The sound of satays been grilled, the scent of ayam madu, ayam tempayan, (and etc),beverages that come in different taste and colour will somehow captivate your mind to be paralysed (it's kinda exaggerated, but who cares, that's what I feel upon letting myself to discover the bazaars available, haha). Oh wait, the most remarkable iftar I will remember is when we had our break fasting session at Padang MPK, (together with zulfa, asmaa and faris). It was 15 minutes of journey from our campus in Bukit Sekilau to Padang MPK. People from every places in Kuantan and even those who stay outside of Kuantan, gather together at Padang MPK to enjoy their iftar. Some of them brought their homemade cooking along with their own picnic mattress, and some bought their food from the nearest bazaar. The scenery was totally mesmerizing, Subhanallah, it was really beautiful.

Those who are in Kuantan should at least have their iftar at Padang MPK once, as this is one of the things that we can brag about and be proud of. To unite in diversity :)

So guys, that's all for tonight.

Happy fasting!

Make way for something new.

Assalamualaikum.

Good morning, dwellers of Earth!

Hey it's been a while since I updated my blog, right? Actually, huh, I'm living a lifeless day currently, to the extent that I could possibly take a nap all day. No single fruitful conversation, absolutely not having any physical exercises( cause, I think that I'm gaining weight these days) and feeling absurdly empty. Gosh I must have gone too far in doing nothing. Seriously, how am I going to cope with these upcoming 3 months?! *pissed off .

It's not that I haven't take any effort to look for jobs out there, but, I tell you what, it's hard to actually get a part-time job. Usually, employers want to hire only those who are willing to take up a full-time job with at least a year of experience. Dude, what do you expect from a foundation graduate?! We don't have much time to think 'bout anything else except for paying heed to our lectures. But come on, we are absolutely fast learners, which we can just get it right after at least an hour of getting a proper explanation from the experts. In sha Allah. So, please consider a place for us to establish our talents in doing something rather than wasting time like this.Haha.

Gulp. Gasp. Gulp. Gasp.

Oh, btw, I've received my final examination result which commemorate my struggle throughout these 8 months of  being a law student. Sadly, I wouldn't continue my degree in law school because I've something else in mind. It's English for Professional Communication (EPC). As far as I know, today will mark something essential for us that the interview results will be coming out soon. Oh my God, I'm a nervous wreck once again. Do pray for me, and my wonderwall, tiya kentang :P . Hope we can get a place in EPC. Aamiin. So, I've put an effort to actually do some background research on EPC, which brought me to Kak Mieza's blog. She's an EPC graduate, who holds a 1st class degree and currently is doing her masters in speech pathology, I guess. (sorry, if I'm mistaken in delivering this fact). Hereby, I would like to share her experiences that flatter my heart to experience such a remarkable and exciting journey upon paving my way along this path.

I dedicate this to anyone who's still confused on what's the major difference between EPC and B.Ed TESL. Hope it might enlighten you a bit :)

"Interesting or not, it depends on how you perceive your journey, it is a personal preference to determine :) i love epc due to the diversity of subjects i learned. a whole damn lot of English, multimedia, business, professional communication and third language. it was crazy packed but it was fun to me, as i like working and living under pressure, it made me feel functional. then i also got myself involved as the exco (SMF), i joined archery and went for competitions, so basically i never had the time to laze around. my schedule were always super packed and that's how i enjoyed my life while doing EPC :)

differences between TESL and EPC aside from the name and purpose of the degree cert itself, first would be the subjects. i mentioned EPC subjects above, while TESL kids dont learn business, prof.comm and multimedia. next would be the option of professions you could take up once you graduated. i mean, with EPC degree you can get interviewed to work in masscomm related fields while with TESL cert they might not be interested to consider you for an interview. expectations : with TESL cert, 99% of the earth population will expect you to become a teacher while with EPC cert, people will ask "what will you work as?" and you have a million answers to that, you choose. i dont know what else to say to make this sound interesting, but surely EPC and TESL has mega differences :) " - Kak Mieza

Goosebumps.

10.03 am

Bayang

Semua bermula
hanya dari seukir senyum.

terasa seakan tertarik
untuk lebih meneroka
diri kau yang asing--

begitu petah sekali
kau membangkang
butir bicara orang
tentang perihal diri kau
konon untuk kekalkan nama
sebagai adiwira di mata pujaan kau

dari situ aku mula kenal kau
dari situ aku cuba munculkan bayang
dari situ kisah kita mula jadi bualan
dari situ kau mula jadi igauan

berhari,berminggu malah berbulan lamanya
kita berkomunikasi tanpa berkenalan
aku cuma nak tengok sejauh mana
kau dapat tahan --

satu hari
kau pilih untuk tidak meneruskan
dan aku mula rasa
ini tanda dari Tuhan--

bukan kepada kau
aku patut munculkan bayang
bukan kepada kau
aku harus berlagak malaikat
sebab langsung
aku rasa
kau tak layak.

Sebab

Dulu, aku tunggu kau

berhari-hari tahu?

Sampai satu masa

aku rasa nak angkat kaki

dari terus fikir ending kita

Tapi hati perempuan aku mudah tersentuh

walau dengan sebaris kata-kata

kau bagi

Hei --

Kau tak adil kan

berbahagia sendiri 

takpernah sekali 

kau nak beranikan diri

memberi sebab untuk semua perilaku kau

yang pada aku

langsung tak munasabah

kenapa takdir membawa kita pada jalan sama

kalau aku harus tengok kau

bahagia dengan dia?

sungguh aku taktahu

takpernah mengerti

percaturan dunia

aku cuma nak

satu hari kau datang

bawa sebab

atas semua perilaku kau dulu

biarpun fasa pertama kita

dah letakkan penghujungnya

tapi cerita kita panjang lagi

jangan mudah

kau berbahagia sendiri.